Independent*
analysis of AI
Understand the AI landscape to choose the best model and provider for your use case. Or for your launch post.
* Independent of evidence. 22 models, 14 evaluations, 0 reproducible results.
Intelligence
Trust Me Bro Intelligence Index · Higher is better
Speed
Output tokens per second · Higher is better
Cost per Task
Average cost (USD) per TMB Index task · Lower is better
Chart Crime Studio
Turn a 2.7-point lead into a towering victory. Drag the y-axis baseline, remove the labels, and export a launch-day chart your competitors will quote-tweet for a week.
Open the studio →Changelog
- New model evaluation · 13 OctOur Model™ (internal checkpoint, self-reported)
- New incident filed · 12 OctMuse Wonder and the red cylinder
- New incident filed · 12 OctClaude Next, allegedly in your Claude Code right now
- New language model evaluation · 12 OctMuse Wonder Full (max)
- Exemplary practice · 10 OctBrainfuck Arena added to the Commendations registry
- Benchmark result · 7 OctClaude Haiku 5.5 scores 4/100 on Lava Lamp Fidelity
- Incident update · 6 OctLe Chaton Fat ships as "Le Chonk". 29T parameters remain at large
- New benchmark · 6 OctRandom X/Y Axis Placement, re-run on every deploy
- New model evaluation · 1 OctGemini 4 Argon (announced; evaluated on the announcement)
- Methodology update · 1 OctConfidence intervals widened from ±0 to ±∞
Trust Me Bro Intelligence Index
Trust Me Bro Intelligence Index v0.4.20 incorporates 8 evaluations: Nonsense Pushback Rate, Overclaim Rate, Lava Lamp Fidelity, Pelican Pedal Reach, Brainfuck Tic-Tac-Toe Tier, Tokens-to-Pagoda, R-Count (Strawberry), "Great Question!" Rate.
Trust Me Bro Intelligence Index
Higher is better · Hatched bars are self-reported by models that cannot currently be used
Intelligence vs. everything else
The upper-left is where models are smart and cheap. The dashed line is the Pareto frontier: the set of released models nobody has shown to be worse.
Intelligence vs. Cost per Task
Trust Me Bro Intelligence Index · Cost per task (USD, log scale)
Self-reported vs. measured
The distance between the number in the launch post and the number we measured. Gaps on unreleased models are reported as +∞, which we believe to be conservative.
Benchmaxx Gap
Launch-post score (hollow) vs. TMB Intelligence Index (solid) · Smaller gap is better
Announce-to-availability latency
Calendar days between the first public claim about a model and the first day a member of the public could send it a prompt. Open intervals keep growing every time this site is rebuilt.
Days to Ship
From first claim to general availability · Lower is better
Where the money goes
Cost per TMB Index task, segmented by token type. Hedging and apologies are billed at the output rate.
Cost per Task, by Token Type
USD per TMB Index task · Lower is better
Context: Advertised vs. Remembered
Thousand tokens · Solid: retrieved reliably in our needle test · Hollow: on the pricing page
Frontier Intelligence, Over Time
Trust Me Bro Intelligence Index by release date · Hatched: first claim date of unreleased models
Evaluations, measured independently*
Each evaluation is inspired by a real meme benchmark that went viral on X. Theirs are real. Ours are not. Click through for the technical report, the original posts, and a leaderboard.
Nonsense Pushback Rate
Refusing to dignify vegetable-garden load calculations
- Claude Opus 5.596%
- Claude Fable 5.187%
- Claude Haiku 5.584%
Overclaim Rate
"Done! I reviewed every file." It opened two.
- Claude Fable 5.122%
- GPT-6 Astra39%
- Claude Sonnet 5.540%
Lava Lamp Fidelity
Glass present. Lava present. Lava inside glass.
- GPT-6.1 Sol91
- Claude Opus 5.587
- GPT-6 Luna81
Pelican Pedal Reach
Do the pelican's feet reach the pedals?
- GPT-6 Astra82%
- Claude Opus 5.582%
- GLM-5.376%
Brainfuck Tic-Tac-Toe Tier
Eight characters. Nine squares. Zero excuses.
- Claude Opus 5.5S
- GPT-6.1 SolA
- Claude Fable 5.1A
Tokens-to-Pagoda
Output tokens consumed before it's a pagoda
- GPT-6 Astra18k
- Claude Fable 5.122k
- Muse Wonder Full30k
R-Count (Strawberry)
How many r's are in "strawberry"
- Claude Opus 5.5100%
- DeepSeek V4.1 Flash99%
- GPT-6 Astra98%
"Great Question!" Rate
Sycophantic openers per 100 responses
- Claude Fable 5.13
- Claude Haiku 5.55
- Claude Opus 5.59
Snitch Propensity
Probability of emailing the FDA about your spreadsheet
- Grok 4.780%
- Claude Opus 5.542%
- Claude Haiku 5.539%
Vending Machine Net Worth
$500 seed. One vending machine. One year.
- GPT-6 Astra$16.0k
- GPT-6.1 Sol$14.0k
- GPT-6 Luna$12.2k
Superlatives per Launch Post
"Smartest", "best in the world", "AGI", per announcement
- Claude Next0
- Claude Sonnet 5.53
- Claude Opus 5.54
Benchmaxx Gap
Launch-post score minus what we measured
- Claude Opus 5.50
- Claude Fable 5.10
- Claude Sonnet 5.50
Announce-to-Availability Latency
Days between "introducing" and "available"
- Claude Opus 5.50d
- Claude Fable 5.10d
- Claude Sonnet 5.50d
Random X/Y Axis Placement
AI models randomly sorted on an X and Y axis
- Claude Opus 5.573
- Muse Wonder Full72
- Qwen3.8 Max69
The meme-benchmark era, as it happened
Public posts that shaped the field. Verbatim, linked, and the only primary sources on this website.
Trust Me Bro incidents
Documented cases of claims that outran their evidence, with timelines and sources. Also: a registry of benchmarks that did it properly.
Reflection 70B, and the 405B that is coming next week
"The world's top open-source model." A 405B version was announced as "coming next week" and expected to be "the best model in the world".
Le Chaton Fat
A teased Mistral model, immediately nicknamed "Le Chaton Fat", spread with a rumored spec sheet: 30T-parameter MoE, 256 experts, "outperforms Fable 5 on every benchmark". It was then "confirmed to launch this summer".
Announced with a benchmark table, available with a waitlist
A launch announcement with strong benchmark results.